I saved you and then you ran because being broken is all you know. It’s comfortable. It’s easy. To feel like no one loves you. To feel alone. It’s easier to say you’re a “free bird.” To live only within yourself, for yourself. Selfish. To guard you’re heart. Give it to me and then take it back. Just like that. Like I never existed. I loved you. Made you feel like a whole person. But you like feeling like you’re in pieces. It’s comfortable. It’s familiar. I’m scary because I made you feel. I thawed you’re heart. Vulnerable. Able to be damaged. You were lost. Drifting. Just waiting for time to pass. Until you could leave everything that took you’re love but never gave it back. Leave them empty like they’ve always left you. I loved you I do.
The wildness has come again…the dire necessity to get out from under what life has been suffocating me with and just live. The responsibilities. The disappointment. The ignorant society. They all just stifle my fire for life. I need to be free to walk where the stars guide me, to feel the moonlight, to be warmed by the sun. This world we live in is frightening and before it becomes worse I need to soak up as much as it will show me. My most comfortable place is with nature and that’s where I strive to be. A person within the wilderness. I’ve lived the city/suburb life and the hate I have towards it is unsettling. It suffocates me, puts me in a box, in a car, and then in another box. I want to sleep under the stars. See the northern and southern lights. Feel the ocean rocking my body. Hear the sound of leaves beneath my feet. Taste the first snowflakes. Smell the rain. I don’t want to be a possession or to need a possession. I just want to be free. Free from wants and desires and hunger. To be fully satisfied by life. To be happy.